Building the Perfect Horror Film
Halloween is upon us! The time of year where girls can get away with dressing like sluts is finally here, but with this glorious time also comes with the inevitable, and truly unnecessary, sequels to the Saw franchise. Full Disclosure: I have seen only the first two films in their entirety, and have seen bits and pieces (pun intended) of the 17 other films. Anyway, with Saw 3-D set to release this weekend, I figured I’d go through my own personal checklist in creating a memorable horror film.
Step 1: The Villain.
What would a horror film be like without the bad guys? With the likes of Michael Myers, Jason Voorhees, Freddy Kreuger, heck, even Kathy Bates in Misery, horror films would be nowhere near as iconic as they are today without the main antagonist. Whether it’s a lone adversary, or a pack of infectious, rabid zombies, the antagonist of a great horror film must contain little to no human emotionality as possible. The more human you make a villain, the less intimidating and fearful it becomes. Now, a major note to this point, that’s not to say the villain doesn’t have an agenda. Leatherface wants to carve victims to find a new face to hide his disfigurement, Voorhees is territorial over Crystal Lake, and hates camp counselors. Even if the killer’s sole purpose is to eat, that’s good enough. There must be a driving force behind the kills, which makes your villain all the more terrifying when he/she won’t stop coming until their sole purpose is completed.
Step 2: Choose Your Victims Wisely
A horror movie wouldn’t be a horror movie without a little blood and death in it. So for my next step, if you really want to thrill an audience with the demise of a particular character, it works better when the audience can connect with the person who is about to get a sledgehammer to the face. The best example is the 2006 remake of “The Hills Have Eyes.” I know the movie was uncomfortable for many people, but what made it work so well was that the film contained characters people could relate to. Sure the plot was a bit horror cliché (a family on vacation makes a wrong turn into psycho-ville) but the characters are still likeable, and it makes the kill that much more impactful.
When a movie’s victims fail to connect with the audience, such as the remake of Friday the 13th or House of Wax, then there’s not much incentive for anyone to care about the death scene. I happily sat through all 1 hour and 53 minutes of House of Wax just to watch Paris Hilton take a PVC pipe to the forehead, but that’s a rare case. Unless of course you’re a torture porn addict, a victim with no humble qualities doesn’t catch my attention.
Step 3: Avoid Torture Porn at All Costs
I don’t know why it’s such a fad right now, but Hollywood seems to be all aboard the torture porn bandwagon, and I think the remake of Texas Chainsaw Massacre might be to blame. Ever since that film came out, horror movies seem to be all about torture effects and brutality. I mean, I’m all for a gorefest (for those of you who don’t know I am a die-hard zombie fan) but I feel with all the Hostels, Saws, Final Destinations, and Human Centipedes of the world, the directors are just trying to get a cheap, shock value out of their kills, rather than keeping within the context of their horror universe. To put it in more universal terms, I’m far more impressed to see an action movie with a car chase/crash that is done with practical effects rather than CGI.
Step 4: Give victims the benefit of the doubt
I can’t tell you how much my willingness to suspend disbelief is shattered when I watch a stupid, overactive, hyper teenage woman fleeing from a brutal killer, only to see her run upstairs rather than out the door. Give the audience a little credit, and don’t take us for granted. If by the off chance any of us was in a situation like the ones presented in most horror films, many people would have the cops at their front door faster than you can say “I’m the Juggernaut, bitch!!!” Make the victims respond to situations a little more realistically. Just look at the film “The Strangers.” A generally good horror movie with victims that think rationally about the situation they’re in. The best scene in the movie was when the boyfriend/husband/whatever he was, decides to hole up in the closet with a shotgun pointed at the doorway. If it were any of us, we’d have done the same thing. Hole up and wait till morning. Horror movies need to continue this trend of creating a smarter class of victim. Do that and you have me sold.
Step 5: NO GIMMICKS!!!
3D has no place in horror cinema. There is no extra dimension needed in watching some poor sap take a chainsaw to the sternum, nor do I want to feel like I’m about to take a machete to the testicles. 3D is a gimmick in horror movies because the way to make 3D work is to have a stunning environment to put your audience in. Avatar worked because the world of Pandora was lush and extravagant. I can’t say the same for Elm Street.
I know I talked about it briefly already, but effects must remain practical. If you want to convince me someone is taking a butcher knife to the chest, make a prosthetic. I tend to have a good eye for CGI and a wobbly, digitized knife wound won’t work. Besides, practical effects, if done correctly, will make your movie last longer for years to come. CGI will continue to get better with time and films like Alien, The Thing, and even The Exorcist used fantastic practical effects that are still frightening and impressive by today’s standards.
The biggest crime to commit in any horror movie is the ”let’s leave it to your imagination” scenario. Films like Blair Witch were great with audiences initially, but as time went on I think people eventually realized that they were duped. I have a wild imagination, and if I wanted to come up with my own version of the Blair Witch (chances are you may think my version makes me psychologically disturbed) I would do it at home, not after spending $8. Give us something to look at.
Step 6: Casting
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| Tell me about the lotion in the basket Clarice |
Hollywood needs to recognize something…not everyone in America is a chiseled and beautiful piece of Greek Art. Horror movies need to stop falling into the easy traps of casting no-name, beautiful actors just so they can axe them in about 5 minutes. Give your film some extra credibility by adding at least one Hollywood talent, even if it is an obscure one. The more respectable horror films of our times are grounded by a strong cast. The Exorcist had Max Von Sydow… Alien had Sigourney Weaver, Tom Skeritt, and John Heard…Silence of the Lambs had Hopkins. Most of the iconic Horror masterpieces of our time had some great thespians at work, and they sold their films with much success. Jack Nicholson in The Shining anyone? I bet you’d be hard pressed to name a talented actor that was in “My Bloody Valentine 3D.”
Step 7: Atmosphere is Everything
A great horror film will be more than just a series of kills. The atmosphere can play a major part by adding tension, anxiety, and fear to any scene, especially if the environment is just as deadly as your killer. Take the original blockbuster movie…Jaws. Besides the fact that the crew of the Orca was dealing with an 800 pound feeding machine, they also had to deal with the isolation of the open water. The creaking floorboards of the boat, added by the never ending splashes of salt water against the current, Jaws was even more frightening thanks to the ocean environment. If a horror film can sell you on a dual threat package of both your villain and the setting, you may have a masterpiece on your hands.
Step 8: An Epic Climax
Hello my name is The Exorcist. Nice to meet you Devil inhabiting a 12 year-old girl. Now I’m going to compel the power of my Christ on you. One of the most iconic scenes in horror cinema came with this film. The climactic Exorcism of little Regan Mcneil will forever live in infamy because of its brilliantly built-up of tension leading to the final confrontation. I mean, even the poster of the film was an iconic, symbolic piece of work. As everyone remembers, it was no small battle. Father Merrin ended up dying in the process, and Father Karras ended up becoming the new vessel for the devil, selflessly chucking his body out of the window to save Regan. Sad…yes, but a great climax nonetheless.
So follow these steps Hollywood. Or else you can say my name three times in the mirror and I’ll slash the tires on your new Mercedes-Benz.
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