HEEEERRRRREEEEE'S SOME IDEAS!!!

Building the Perfect Horror Film

Halloween is upon us! The time of year where girls can get away with dressing like sluts is finally here, but with this glorious time also comes with the inevitable, and truly unnecessary, sequels to the Saw franchise. Full Disclosure: I have seen only the first two films in their entirety, and have seen bits and pieces (pun intended) of the 17 other films. Anyway, with Saw 3-D set to release this weekend, I figured I’d go through my own personal checklist in creating a memorable horror film. 

Step 1: The Villain. 

What would a horror film be like without the bad guys? With the likes of Michael Myers, Jason Voorhees, Freddy Kreuger, heck, even Kathy Bates in Misery, horror films would be nowhere near as iconic as they are today without the main antagonist. Whether it’s a lone adversary, or a pack of infectious, rabid zombies, the antagonist of a great horror film must contain little to no human emotionality as possible. The more human you make a villain, the less intimidating and fearful it becomes.  Now, a major note to this point, that’s not to say the villain doesn’t have an agenda. Leatherface wants to carve victims to find a new face to hide his disfigurement, Voorhees is territorial over Crystal Lake, and hates camp counselors. Even if the killer’s sole purpose is to eat, that’s good enough. There must be a driving force behind the kills, which makes your villain all the more terrifying when he/she won’t stop coming until their sole purpose is completed.

Step 2: Choose Your Victims Wisely

 A horror movie wouldn’t be a horror movie without a little blood and death in it. So for my next step, if you really want to thrill an audience with the demise of a particular character, it works better when the audience can connect with the person who is about to get a sledgehammer to the face. The best example is the 2006 remake of “The Hills Have Eyes.” I know the movie was uncomfortable for many people, but what made it work so well was that the film contained characters people could relate to. Sure the plot was a bit horror cliché (a family on vacation makes a wrong turn into psycho-ville) but the characters are still likeable, and it makes the kill that much more impactful.   

When a movie’s victims fail to connect with the audience, such as the remake of Friday the 13^th or House of Wax, then there’s not much incentive for anyone to care about the death scene. I happily sat through all 1 hour and 53 minutes of House of Wax just to watch Paris Hilton take a PVC pipe to the forehead, but that’s a rare case. Unless of course you’re a torture porn addict, a victim with no humble qualities doesn’t catch my attention. 

Step 3: Avoid Torture Porn at All Costs

I don’t know why it’s such a fad right now, but Hollywood seems to be all aboard the torture porn bandwagon, and I think the remake of Texas Chainsaw Massacre might be to blame. Ever since that film came out, horror movies seem to be all about torture effects and brutality. I mean, I’m all for a gorefest (for those of you who don’t know I am a die-hard zombie fan) but I feel with all the Hostels, Saws, Final Destinations, and Human Centipedes of the world, the directors are just trying to get a cheap, shock value out of their kills, rather than keeping within the context of their horror universe.  To put it in more universal terms, I’m far more impressed to see an action movie with a car chase/crash that is done with practical effects rather than CGI. 

Step 4: Give victims the benefit of the doubt

I can’t tell you how much my willingness to suspend disbelief is shattered when I watch a stupid, overactive, hyper teenage woman fleeing from a brutal killer, only to see her run upstairs rather than out the door. Give the audience a little credit, and don’t take us for granted. If by the off chance any of us was in a situation like the ones presented in most horror films, many people would have the cops at their front door faster than you can say “I’m the Juggernaut, bitch!!!” Make the victims respond to situations a little more realistically. Just look at the film “The Strangers.” A generally good horror movie with victims that think rationally about the situation they’re in. The best scene in the movie was when the boyfriend/husband/whatever he was, decides to hole up in the closet with a shotgun pointed at the doorway. If it were any of us, we’d have done the same thing. Hole up and wait till morning. Horror movies need to continue this trend of creating a smarter class of victim. Do that and you have me sold.

Step 5: NO GIMMICKS!!!

3D has no place in horror cinema. There is no extra dimension needed in watching some poor sap take a chainsaw to the sternum, nor do I want to feel like I’m about to take a machete to the testicles. 3D is a gimmick in horror movies because the way to make 3D work is to have a stunning environment to put your audience in. Avatar worked because the world of Pandora was lush and extravagant. I can’t say the same for Elm Street. 

I know I talked about it briefly already, but effects must remain practical. If you want to convince me someone is taking a butcher knife to the chest, make a prosthetic. I tend to have a good eye for CGI and a wobbly, digitized knife wound won’t work. Besides, practical effects, if done correctly, will make your movie last longer for years to come. CGI will continue to get better with time and films like Alien, The Thing, and even The Exorcist used fantastic practical effects that are still frightening and impressive by today’s standards.

The biggest crime to commit in any horror movie is the ”let’s leave it to your imagination” scenario. Films like Blair Witch were great with audiences initially, but as time went on I think people eventually realized that they were duped. I have a wild imagination, and if I wanted to come up with my own version of the Blair Witch (chances are you may think my version makes me psychologically disturbed) I would do it at home, not after spending $8. Give us something to look at. 

Step 6: Casting

Tell me about the lotion in the basket Clarice

Hollywood needs to recognize something…not everyone in America is a chiseled and beautiful piece of Greek Art. Horror movies need to stop falling into the easy traps of casting no-name, beautiful actors just so they can axe them in about 5 minutes. Give your film some extra credibility by adding at least one Hollywood talent, even if it is an obscure one. The more respectable horror films of our times are grounded by a strong cast. The Exorcist had Max Von Sydow… Alien had Sigourney Weaver, Tom Skeritt, and John Heard…Silence of the Lambs had Hopkins. Most of the iconic Horror masterpieces of our time had some great thespians at work, and they sold their films with much success. Jack Nicholson in The Shining anyone? I bet you’d be hard pressed to name a talented actor that was in “My Bloody Valentine 3D.”

Step 7: Atmosphere is Everything

A great horror film will be more than just a series of kills. The atmosphere can play a major part by adding tension, anxiety, and fear to any scene, especially if the environment is just as deadly as your killer. Take the original blockbuster movie…Jaws. Besides the fact that the crew of the Orca was dealing with an 800 pound feeding machine, they also had to deal with the isolation of the open water. The creaking floorboards of the boat, added by the never ending splashes of salt water against the current, Jaws was even more frightening thanks to the ocean environment. If a horror film can sell you on a dual threat package of both your villain and the setting, you may have a masterpiece on your hands.

Step 8: An Epic Climax 

Hello my name is The Exorcist. Nice to meet you Devil inhabiting a 12 year-old girl. Now I’m going to compel the power of my Christ on you. One of the most iconic scenes in horror cinema came with this film. The climactic Exorcism of little Regan Mcneil will forever live in infamy because of its brilliantly built-up of tension leading to the final confrontation. I mean, even the poster of the film was an iconic, symbolic piece of work. As everyone remembers, it was no small battle. Father Merrin ended up dying in the process, and Father Karras ended up becoming the new vessel for the devil, selflessly chucking his body out of the window to save Regan. Sad…yes, but a great climax nonetheless. 

So follow these steps Hollywood. Or else you can say my name three times in the mirror and I’ll slash the tires on your new Mercedes-Benz.

Stop All the Downloadin'!!!

Are Gaming Developers Getting Too Complacent Thanks to DLC?

As many gamers know, yesterday was the highly anticpated release of Fallout: New Vegas. The game has been met with mostly favorable reviews, however many gamers and review sites have complained across the board about a number of bugs and glitches within the game. Not to say I told you so, but...I told you so. The game was being developed by Obsidian Entertainment, the same people who released the bug heavy Alpha Protocol and Star Wars: Knights of the Old Republic II. Let me be clear, this blog post isn't about ripping Obsidian a new one again. The new Fallout is being praised for it's large and expanisve world, which will suck gamers in for more hours than a World of Warcraft addict. Instead, my problem comes with the unavoidable patches and updates this game will get to address several of these bugs and glitches.

Bethesda softworks (the developer of Fallout 3 and publisher of New Vegas) released a statement today saying they're aware of the problems with New Vegas and are working on a new patch for the game which will release sometime in the near future. Here's my problem with this statement. First, the fact that Bethesda is already making announcements about the game's inherent problems is a bit disheartening considering the game just hit store shelves yesterday. Sure we all should be grateful that the company is working on fixing the problem, but is the availability of Downloadable Content allowing game developers to get complacent with their work? I sure as hell hope not, but I'm starting to notice a trend.

If we do a Superman and reverse the world back 2 years, another highly anticipated game known as Gears of War 2 also met some internal problems that needed a few weeks of fixing. The single player campaign played flawless, however the multiplayer matchmaking system was, for lack of a better word, disastrous. Players would be met with unbelievable wait times in order to get a single match going. I personally waited a full 30 minutes to get a group together, and my game lasted 10 minutes at best. The time wasn't adding up correctly. Epic Games Lead designer Cliff Blezinski has gone on record stating Epic ultimately screwed up with Gears 2, and the company has since released six different online title updates that have streamlined the online experience. It took them about a month or two to iron out all the kinks in the game, but it just begs the question why didn't the game come out working like it should have right out of the starting gate? It's almost like a used car salesman selling you a car without the transmission, but promising you you can drive it even though he'll get it fully working in about a month. In the words of Johnny Cochran defense: DAT DOES NOT MAKE SENSE!!!

Son...Taking cover behind a wooden bench is not strategic thinking

Flash forward to today, and now a game like Fallout: New Vegas is shipping while it's clearly broken. I'm not too sure how a publisher decides to handle a game's release date, but videos of the bugs have been circulating the internet, proving that the publisher shipped the game knowing the bugs were there. Bugs are awful in a game. They immediately make players lose their sense of immersion, making it nearly unplayable at times. I came across a very amusing one that happens right at the beginning of the game. People are calling it "The exorcism of Doc Mitchell." It's really funny. Take a look.

 

Whatever the case may be I'm hoping most companies are learning from either their peers or their own mistakes. I know Epic won't make the same mistake twice thanks to the recent push back by Microsoft of Gears of War 3 from April 2011 to Holiday 2011. The folks at Epic have been blessed with more development time, which includes a public beta in the near future. As a gamer, I would much rather wait an extra month or two for a game to be polished, and is bug free. Publishers don't have to cram their games down everyone's throats so soon. If we want your game, we'll buy it regardless of when it comes out. Halo 2 ultimately proved that theory. The hype and anticipation surrounding that game was larger than Roseanne's waistline, and while the game was delayed for months, even years, it finally released the way it was supposed to be...complete...and people bought it.

It's OK to delay your game. Last year there were at least 6 (maybe more) high profile games that got pushed back because of either the need for more development time, or the fact they didn't want to compete with the 800-pound gorilla in the room known as Call of Duty: Modern Warfare 2. From the looks of it, a game like Fallout: New Vegas could've used another month to tweak and still would've made its coveted holiday release cycle. I just hope that DLC doesn't become more of an excuse for developers to make their release dates because it only hurts the company and publisher's image in my eyes. Like I've stated before, I never really trusted Obsidian in their game design and it turns out I can rightfully give myself a pat on the shoulder.

A Quarter Century of Gaming Utopia

Celebrating 25 Years of The Nintendo Entertainment System

MAMMA MIA!!! How time flies.

If it were up to gamers, today would be a national holiday where everyone would have outdoor bar-b-q's and get paid vacation time. 25 Years ago today, a little rectangular, gray piece of gaming hardware would arrive on store shelves here in the United States, forever changing the way people would play video games. The NES turned 25 today, and what better way to honor the beloved system than to write a non-lyrical poem, in honor of the system that sucked so many hours of social activity away from kids. Enjoy.

Oh Nintendo, I tear at your age.
You are responsible for joy, wonder, and rage.
For many moons, you kept us company at night,
With games like Mario, Zelda, and Excitebike.
Your simplicity is legendary, yet your difficulty is notorious,
We all remember how Ninja Gaiden's eagles were nefarious.
Yet, as I reminisce of your challenges,
Victory was as great as painting canvasses.
A directional pad with two buttons,
Your controls make us better than Rush'n Attack's Russians.
Plumbers, brawlers, and legendary Elves,
Each character would embrace our shelves.
There was no limit to your power,
like when Mario would pick up a flower.
You paved the way for future games,
just like when we had to search another castle for our dames.
Jumping, punching, and sometimes shooting,
Your music was always, quite so soothing.
Mega Man, Mario, and Maybe Metroid,
Each character was always enjoyed.
You taught us that not everything is on difficult mode,
Why, because of you, there's the Konami Code.
UP, UP, DOWN, DOWN, LEFT, RIGHT, LEFT, RIGHT, B,A,B,A
Never again, would our Contra soldiers need to fray.
So we thank you Nintendo, thank you for the memories,
because without them, well, we'd still be playing Jeopardy.

So that was my lame honorary poem for the NES. There are plenty of fond memories to be had with what this system did for many gamers today. I know that without the NES, I would never have been as passionate about gaming as I am today. Sure some people say it's a waste of time, but I could probably say the same thing about collecting coins, and not the virtual kind. For many of us gamers, we can associate a fond memory with plenty of the games of last generation. So I thought I'd point out my own personal Top 25 NES games, which may or may not include a brief gaming memory of my own. Remember, this is my own personal list, not what I consider the best games of all time. So internet trolls who may see this complaining that 'Kung Fu' isn't on the list can go suck it. I never had Kung Fu as a kid. Enjoy:

#25 Double Dragon II: The Revenge

It was kind of a funny story about this game. We never owned the first Double Dragon, but we had the second one. Anyway, my fondest memory of this game was the fact that you could play with 2-Players, and beat up your friend and get rewarded with an extra life. Subliminal messages anyone? Besides that, this game blew my mind with the fact that you could now kick backwards, which just slightly nudged the difficulty meter down a bit. Still, this game was no walk in the park. If you could complete this game on the hardest difficulty mode, you would be rewarded with fighting some space boss who could vanish at will and knock your ass out in two successive punches. Lame.


#24 Metal Gear

"My brain have started to melt." I never personally owned the game...my cousin did. I remember watching him play this game non-stop and I couldn't quite comprehend what was happening in front of me. When he would be chased by rottweilers, I used to think they were large pieces of doodie chasing him. It wasn't until years later I would get my hands on this game, probably around 14, when I would come to appreciate how ahead of its time it was. Stealth mechanics in a Nintendo game? Never!





#23 Double Dragon

Again, I never owned the game, cousin did, but when I played it, I enjoyed the simplicity of punching and kicking. There's just something satisfying about playing a beat em up game as a kid. I would actually feel like I was doing something that matters by whacking a large dude named 'Abobo' in the gut with my boots.






#22 Gauntlet

Ok so I have to admit, I knew there was a warrior, wizard, and an elf, but for years I never knew what the hell a Valkyrie was. She honestly looked like another man, and I think this was the first time I realized I was slightly sexist, because despite thinking she was a man, I still never used her.





#21 Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles I

Two things stand out when I remember this game. First, that underwater stage was impossible to get through without losing at least one of your turtles. So naturally, I used Rafael, the worst in the game, to die first so I could save up my best turtle, Donatello. That bow was relentless. And second, why was it that once I made it inside the technodrome I always had to shut the game off? Not because I had to leave, but because it was THE most insane difficulty in an NES game to date.





#20 Ninja Gaiden

Speaking of difficult, Ninja Gaiden was one of those games that I would always come back to regardless of my constant failure rate. This was the one of the first times I knew how persistent I was at games. I never liked quitting, but there was something about dying to a boss, and then having to re-do the entire level from the beginning, while attempting to save up your health mind you, that I would shut the game off in frustration.




#19 Super Mario Bros. 2

So I knew what Mario Bros. and Mario Bros. 3 was, but I never once considered this game to be a part of the Super Mari Bros. canon. It was so radically different from both games that not once did I pick up on it. I do admit that I always picked Princess Peach. Not because I wasn't sexist, but because her levitating jump was just too good to pass up.





#18 Kirby's Adventure

I got into Kirby a lot later in life, but even as a 13 year-old kid, I loved the fluffiness of the game. Clouds, Fat Ducks named King Dedede, and of course, the fatness cream puff himself Kirby. I couldn't help but be grateful that I didn't play this as a child because it would've warped my mind into thinking I needed to be a fat kid. I mean think about it, you were forced to constantly eat other enemies to "absorb" their powers. This may have been the birthplace for cannibalism for all I know. For the record, I was chubby, not fat.




#17 Metroid

Justin Bailey. That was the name that would ultimately wash my frustrations away with relief. Sure Samus was a chick, but she was a chick I respected. She shot missiles, fought aliens, did flips, and dropped bombs (not the kind we drop everyday in the bathroom if you catch my drift). Metroid made an impression on me because it ultimately created a genre of games where you could progressively explore larger environments as you upgrade your character. Plus the game logged in at 4+ hours, which was unheard of back in the day.




#16 Zelda 2: The Adventure of Link

Same as Mario 2, this was one of those games that I didn't really associate with its predecessor because of how radically different it was. Zelda two gave us a side-scrolling Link who could go into towns and purchase things like spells and life/magic. Still, this was one of those games that I never got to beat as a kid because of its raging difficulty. I ultimately had to root for my older brother because he was the only one who could make it all the way to the final boss....Dark Link.




#15 Pro Wrestling

I can't remember who got us this game, but for some reason I always played Pro Wrestling at my grandmother's house. There was no reason, I was just always in the mood to play the game there. Maybe there was some subconscious thing where I wanted to wrestle my grandmother. I dunno. I also loved the class of fighters to choose from, as well as their unique finishing moves. I'm looking at you Fighter Huyabusa and your back brain kick. I would personally choose Star Man, who I always thought was an intergalactic space fighter because he had pink skin and a large blue star on his face.




#14 Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles III: The Manhattan Project

I remember playing this game heavily towards the back end of my NES' life cycle. What made TMNT 3 great was that each Turtle had a special play style. Of course, I always picked Donatello, but finally this was an NES game that was difficult, but not impossible. Plus I remember playing the game with my school friends and specifically asking myself why games don't include multiplayer all the time.




#13 Blaster Master

Talk about a trip down memory lane. This had to have been one our oldest games in our NES library. What I remember most about Blaster Master was that it was never smart to leave your tank. I used to think of it as 2 games in one because you play half of the game in your tank, and then the other half on foot through these insanely difficult dungeon like rooms. And with a name like Blaster Master, it just screamed 80's, which everyone loved.




#12 Bionic Commando

Another game I got into when I was older, Bionic Commando was a great action game that I considered to be Mario with Guns. I got into this game when I was 14 and my brother went to college. He bought Bionic Commando and every time I visited his dorm, I would sit my butt down on his futon and play the hell out of it. It's almost law of dorm rooms to own a futon by the way. The platforming was sensational, and the shooting was gratifying. Not only that, there were loads of upgrades to get along the way. I tend to love a game where your character gets progressively stronger.



#11 RBI Baseball

Countless nights of match-ups against my older brother. RBI Baseball was one of those games where I learned the sport of baseball because of it. I became a baseball nut for a while because of this game, and I remember asking myself "how come the Marlins aren't in this game?"






#10 Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles II: The Arcade

I may have more fond memories of the arcade rather than the NES game, but still, the memories are there. I think what made this game so fantastic was the first level. Right off the bat your fighting the Foot Clan in a burning building which had steel balls falling from the stairwells. It was insane. I also enjoyed each of the boss fights. There's just something addicting about a good arcade style game that you can play with your friends in the comfort of your home.




#9 Kid Icarus

One of my favorites games for the system. And what made this game even cooler was the soundtrack. You can't think of Kid Icarus without humming the idyllic natured music of the game. The game was also one of those vibrantly colored games that just made you smile. I guess that's what happens when you play as an angel...you're just happy.





#8 Mega Man 2

Speaking of great soundtracks, Mega Man 2 had one of the coolest soundtracks to any NES game. The bosses for each stage are lame by today's standards, but they felt so varied and cool for back then. Air Man was the cloud stage, Wood Man was the forest stage, Bubble Man was the water stage. It was perfect.






#7 Castlevania 3: Dracula's Curse

Sure there were two other games before it, but Castlevania 3 had the best of both worlds. It was a polished action game that allowed you to play as different characters when given the chance, and it also contained some slight RPG elements in the way you traverse the game's stages. The game also allowed you to play as characters other than Trevor Belmont, which was a mind blowing concept to me as a child. For some reason, I would pick up Grant the Pirate. One, pirates are cool, second, he could get you across the levels faster because of his wall crawling ability. Double Cool.


#6 Contra

People remember Contra for it's difficulty, but I always found it to be kind of easy believe it or not, even without the Konami code. The key to winning, never lose the spread gun. And if you're playing with 2-players, leave the guy with the spread gun behind you. It was flawless. Oh and another thing, I used to think that the big, brawny dude on the left looked like one of my older brothers. It was eerily similar.




#5 Super Mario Bros. 

Talk about a nasty cherry pop. Super Mario Bros. was for me like it was with everyone else...my first official game. I played Mario after getting my face bashed in Mike Tyson's Punch-Out. My cousin let me play Mario thinking it was an easier way to get me into video games...and it worked. I played and played until my parents yelled at me, and I would eventually make my way back into the boxing ring for revenge. And for the lucky few who had the privilege of owning the Nintendo Zapper, Duck Hunt was tacked onto this game adding to the already limitless fun level.



#4 Mike Tyson's Punch-Out!!

The comeback kid indeed. My first memory with Punch-Out came when I was at my cousins house. I snuck into his room to play the game, and I got my ass beat down by Glass Joe, the first opponent. He had a record of 1-99, and since that day my cousin and brothers have haunted me, telling me that his 1 win was against me. It's true, I sucked, but then I played Mario, came back to Punch-Out, beat Glass Joe, and then got beat down by the next guy, the German dude. At least I got to have my revenge against that ginger bastard. Besides that little memory, to this day I've only been able to beat Mike Tyson once in my life, and I won with 3 seconds left in the final round. Mike Tyson was the ultimate villain in a video game. He could knock you down in one hit, and he would flash a blinding white gaze before he struck, making it even more of an intimidating fight. Still, it was a crowning moment when I beat Kid Dynamite, as I'm sure for anyone else who went toe-to-toe with him.

#3 Legend of Zelda

Hours wasted, all to fight a large bull wizard named Ganon, which would then force you play a completely different second quest afterward. Zelda was one of those games that you needed a friend to refer to in order to beat. Fortunately that friend was both my brother and my cousin, who had each referred to the legendary 'Nintendo Power' magazine for guidance in beating this game. Zelda was great because of its open world gameplay, and the items, oh Lord were the items beautiful. If any video game developers are reading this...which I doubt...more games need a boomerang as a weapon!



#2 Tecmo Super Bowl

This game is notorious in our family. Tecmo Super Bowl was the game that solidified me as a football fanatic. I learned the rules of the game playing this, and I also learned some of the legendary athletes who graced the field. Bo Jackson is king in the Lopez household. There are way too many memories I have with this game, but by far the fondest was around Christmas time when my cousin would sleep over our house so my brother and I could play an entire season of Tecmo Super Bowl with him. Sometimes we would share a team, sometimes we would have different ones. The best thing about the game was that the play clock was so fast, allowing you to finish a season, including the super bowl, in about 3 hours. The official NFL licensing, the stat tracking, all these things made Tecmo Super Bowl the ultimate trendsetter for sports game, which I will safely call the best sports game that will ever exist.

#1 Super Mario Bros. 3

The most hyped/sold/awesome video game of all time. If you haven't played Super Mario Bros. 3, then you will have to console the bottom of my foot for counseling. I don't have a specific memory for Mario, because I played it more times than I can remember. It is everything you could want in a video game, and is accessible to all who play it. Plus, who doesn't want to play as a flying raccoon or an agile frog?

Fallout: New Vegas A Big Gamble

The Next Apocalyptic RPG Could Be a Crapshoot

Hi...I'm here to f**k s**t up.

It's already less than a week before the highly anticipated wasteland RPG series "Fallout" releases its latest installment "Fallout: New Vegas." The game is getting loads of pre-release hype, and rightfully so. Fallout 3 was a groundbreaking game in the industry that redefined the way people play open world games thanks to the crew at Bethesda Softworks. Bethesda, best known for their work on the Elder Scrolls series, created what I call "beautiful disaster" in it's view of a post-apocalyptic Washington, D.C. To an untrained eye, Fallout 3 may have looked like Elder Srolls with guns, but with a bigger emphasis on combat thanks to the V.A.T.S system, and new RPG elements like karma and companions to toy around with, the game became a radiation free haven for gamer geeks. This time however, a new development team is taking over in bringing the next installment of the successful post-apocalyptic franchise, and I'm a little concerned with what we may see.

A company called Obsidian Entertainment has taken the reins from Bethesda in Fallout: New Vegas, and they've been tasked with the daunting challenge of making a bigger, badder, and bloodier game than their predecessor. No small feat if you ask me. From the gameplay footage and screen shots released so far, New Vegas looks like a nice game, but I'm still not convinced that the full package will make me want to wander the Mojave desert for 20+ hours. Just by looking at Obsidian's resume, I'm keeping a little distance from New Vegas. Obsidian first came to light back in 2003 with the development of Star Wars: Knights of the Old Republic II. For anyone who played the original game, KOTOR was a benchmark for console RPG's thanks to it's customizable main character features, a fluid, deep combat system, and a fun story driven morality feature. Once KOTOR II hit the market, it was fun, but not genre defining like the first game. In fact, the big problem I had with KOTOR II was bugs. The game had too many moments where it would freeze, glitch, or force you to reload your last save point because your character was stuck in the environment. Not only that, the story was nowhere near as impressive as the first game, which had one of the best endings in gaming history.

Since KOTOR II, Obsidian has dabbled in a couple of other high profile games like Neverwinter Nights 2, and the recently released Alpha Protocol. Alpha Protocol was yet another highly anticipated game that Obsidian failed to deliver. The game's plot revolved around a spy, espionage theme where you play as a Jason Bourne-esque CIA field agent. The game was touted as a third-person action RPG that featured dozens of customizable weapons, and a complex dialogue system that would drive the story forward. The game was both a critical and commercial flop. In all honesty I never played the game because it didn't appeal to me, but based on a collection of reviews, the game was plagued with glitches and bugs, and the combat was stiff and inaccurate. Not to mention the story was never convincing and the dialogue system was ineffective. Sounding a lot like what New Vegas is going for if you ask me...

This guy left the Casinos while he was hot...wha, whaaaaaa

I don't mean to bash on Obsidian, it's just they haven't really proven to me that they can handle the workload when it comes to a game like Fallout. Despite my fears, there are some good things to point out. First, it's Fallout. Obsidian is using the same engine that Bethesda used, and they're making some of the much needed improvements to the game such as some tweaks to the way you handle companions and your dialogue system. They're also fixing certain combat elements of the game like the target reticules, and there's a new mode called hardcore, which ups the difficulty of the game, and forces players to monitor their water consumption, sleep, and backpack management. Many of the developers are also veterans of Black Isle Studios, which worked on the first 2 Fallout games many years ago...so they should have a firm grasp on the essence of the series. Obsidian also has the advantage of toying with a new locale like Vegas. Areas like Hoover Dam, the Mojave, and of course, the Vegas Strip, are all at the players disposal, and this brings me to my next point.

One of the big things New Vegas has going for it is the Vegas locale. Players can enter and exit the strip whenever they please, and get in a few games of mutant blackjack, among other games, if they wish. Still, this to me is just another gimmick that was added just so developers could squeeze more gameplay time out of players. We've seen card games and gambling in games before. Red Dead Redemption is another open world game that allows you to play card games with fellow outlaws if you wish, so I'm personally not that impressed when I hear about casinos. Still, I have to give credit to Obsidian by throwing a nice curve ball in their approach to designing the New Vegas strip by implementing a 1960's atmosphere to the game.

On another side note, Fallout: New Vegas looks bland. I don't mean as a whole, but in terms of the environments and character/enemy animations. Of all the clips I've seen of the game, New Vegas looks very stale at times. Some of the enemy models don't appear too detailed, and environments seem to be hit or miss. It just seems too, for lack of a better word, "blockish," and the frame rate is extremely choppy (another staple of Obsidian games). I don't want to jump to conclusions on the game just yet because these are demo builds, but I hope Obsidian can capture lightning in a bottle with their new game. I want Fallout: New Vegas to be a fantastic game. It's just I have to keep my distance judging from what I've seen by Obsidian. Until then, I feel like this article will make me a target to the legions of Fallout fans out there who may or may not want to use the V.A.T.S. system to take me out. If I were you, I'd go for my legs, I have weak knees.

Here is one of the many clips of the game out there...judge for yourself if you agree with my comments regarding environment/character animations. Enjoy.

Well...That's Like...Your Opinion...Man

Game Reviews a Necessary Evil

WHAT DO YOU MEAN UNCHARTED 2 SUCKS!?!?

We all know the economy sucks. We're at a time where our pockets are not lined as deep as they once were, and we are slowly learning how to become smarter consumer in order to ride out this economic storm. For us gamers, it's hard to stay on a budget. There are so many games we'd all love to get our hands on, but with a $60 buy in, it's one of the harder commitments for a guy to make other than marriage. That's where online video game reviews come in. Gamers put their trust in certain organizations to tell them whether a particular game is good enough to warrant a purchase. Graphics, gameplay, presentation, sound, lasting appeal, etc., these are the things gamers take into account when determining whether a game is worth the hefty purchase, but just like most of the cops in the world, reviewers seem to be riding on an unnecessary power trip.

I love reading game reviews. Every time a new video game title is released, I immediately head over to my favorite sites to check out their review. Giddy with anticipation, I am always hopeful for a great review score. No one wants to see a bad game hit the market, but lately there seems to be a major disparity in every site's review. I respect game reviewers. It's a tough job that requires them to analyze every morsel of the game, just to please people they've never met. Not only that, most of the internet trolls that reviewers cater to don't even respect their opinion half the time. Still, it seems to me that over the past couple of years gaming sites are becoming too over-analytical with their games, and are ruining the chance for someone to enjoy a great game. Whatever happened to answering the sole question...is it a fun game?

If only Sheva didn't exist...this game would have so much potential

Some of the more polarizing reviews of the past include games like Resident Evil 5, Dead Space, the original Assassin's Creed, Castlevania: Lords of Shadow, and as of today...Medal of Honor. These are high profile games that have a large following behind them, yet, when you look at a compilation of their reviews, they're like my old elementary school dodge ball...they're all over the place. Resident Evil 5 got a 9/10 on places like IGN and Game Informer, but G4 gave it a 3/5. Assassin's Creed got a perfect score on Game Pro, but received a B- on 1UP. The scores are too ambiguous, and when we see numbers like this, we as gamers begin to write off the possibilities of playing the game and thus miss the opportunity to try something new for ourselves. In my own personal experience, I was looking forward to a game like Dead Space. I'm a monster freak, and I had my sights set on this gore-fest of a sci-fi game. Once the game hit store shelves, reviewers were tagging Dead Space as too similar of a gameplay style to Resident Evil 4 with it's over the shoulder perspective. Fortunately, I brushed the reviewers off and committed to the game and low and behold it's still one of my favorite action-horror games of all time. The point is, reviews are subjective, and just because someone from a high profile gaming site says something sucks doesn't make it so. Sure the same can be said of a movie critic, but investing time into a 2 hour movie as opposed to a 20 hour game makes a big difference, especially since it's a much deeper form of interaction.

Many gaming sites seem to be be taking too much into account when it comes to reviewing a game. I just want to know if you had fun playing, and if you would recommend it to a friend. Besides that, many reviewers are arguably hypocritical when it comes to their style of reviews. For example, Gametrailers says Medal of Honor plays like a Call of Duty game, partly because it copies the controller layout, yet, they give the game an 8.1. Turn the clock back a week to their review of Castlevania: Lords of Shadow, and they claims the game plays like a God of War/Uncharted hyrbid that plays well, yet they bump the score down to a 7.5. Both games were accused of copying other gameplay mechanics, but Medal of Honor gets the higher score. It a subjective system that boggles the mind, but when all is said and done, you're listening to someone else's opinion and not your own. Video game reviewers hold the executioner's axe when it comes to a video game's sales success or not. I mean, look at a game like Red Dead Redemption. Great game (even though it plays way too similar to Grand Theft Auto IV) but on the inside flap of the game's cover there's a pull-quote from IGN's review of the game. The review was made public no more than a week before the game's release yet that quote was already on a flap that was mass produced a month in advance. I'm not accusing anyone of anything, but the persuasive power is there. 

I'm no Superman when it comes to the Sith-like powers of reviews. I admit, I too am guilty of falling under a game reviewer's spell. Just today I started to see the reviews for Medal of Honor pop around the net, which I confess, I really wanted to try, but I noticed that IGN gave the game a 6/10, while Gametrailers gave it an 8.1/10. Now I don't even know if I even want to rent the game, ultimately catching myself thinking I should just hold out for Call of Duty: Black Ops in November. I just want people to know that sometimes you have to look past all the numbers and just take the review with a grain of salt because you can never please everyone. It's a fact. Grand Theft Auto IV got a perfect 10 on IGN, but I didn't find it to be such a perfect game. It was too similar to the old GTA games, didn't offer anything breathtaking in terms of gameplay or it's over-hyped multiplayer, and I decided to sell it back to Gamestop. 

Most gamers have online access on either their XBOX or PS3's. Many games in today's market allow you to download free demos so you can give the game a quick spin before committing. Sure some demos are also deceiving, but it's better to actually get a hands-on approach with the game for yourself rather than take the word of someone you don't even know. I'm not saying reviews are bad, but always try to keep an open mind. To put it in perspective, some people actually think Indiana Jones and the Kingdom of the Crystal Skull was a good movie....Let that soak in your brain and tell me it doesn't make you shudder as the tasteless opinions some people have.